Author Topic: In search of understanding...  (Read 52052 times)

Jhanon

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Re: In search of understanding...
« Reply #30 on: September 06, 2014, 04:05:35 PM »
Actually I was just talking to him about this the other day. He was defending to me how he liked his thoughts, he did not want to give them up. Of course, he is a scholar. But, I had to inform him of his laziness. Haha.

How interesting. Someone I "friended" on FB has continually sent messages in effort to connect. They are someone of "high society" in a few ways, and live in New York. I found this odd, and since I couldn't find time to call him, I finally just came right out and told him I was a mystic. I have never done that with anyone. Luckily, it wasn't "me" who did it. But he responded to tell me he enjoys "channeling Universal Wisdom", but he rather enjoys thinking.

Cal

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Re: In search of understanding...
« Reply #31 on: September 06, 2014, 07:21:55 PM »
I am coming to the belief that when it begins to search for the identity of I, one begins a Dark Night. Although it has not experienced this to be true I tells it to understand this. Any thoughts?

An issue that I am having with the Four Noble Ones, this leads it to believe I has identity. It does not search, it does not need to know, perhaps thanks are due to Valdy for this.

Cal

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Re: In search of understanding...
« Reply #32 on: September 07, 2014, 07:43:36 PM »
I'm finding it easier to live the contemplative lifestyle with the passing of each day. I become aware from time to time in my daily activities that I am just sitting back watching the habitual actions of my body doing what they do. Keeping its normal routine. Other times, when I am very busy, it is not easy to be in this state. My wife will text, the boss will yell, my equipment just refuses to fulfill its purpose. my mind takes the wheel for a time, yet I am still aware of my tactile sensation, or aura. I've even learned to break some bad habits :) Opiods being on of the bigger ones. Yet my schedule keeps me from meditation. My wife and daughter need the attentions I promised them years back. She has not been receptive of a passion other than her in my life. I'm looking for a "technique" if you will. One that will allow for required meditations during the day, so that I may devote the little bit of time that is not consumed by work, to my family. Any suggestions? Like maybe explain walking meditation. Is it differ  than the stilling of the mind I do during my days? Any help is appreciated, thanks in advance GWV :)

Jhanananda

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Re: In search of understanding...
« Reply #33 on: September 07, 2014, 07:59:10 PM »
I'm finding it easier to live the contemplative lifestyle with the passing of each day. I become aware from time to time in my daily activities that I am just sitting back watching the habitual actions of my body doing what they do. Keeping its normal routine. Other times, when I am very busy, it is not easy to be in this state. My wife will text, the boss will yell, my equipment just refuses to fulfill its purpose. my mind takes the wheel for a time, yet I am still aware of my tactile sensation, or aura. I've even learned to break some bad habits :) Opiods being on of the bigger ones. Yet my schedule keeps me from meditation. My wife and daughter need the attentions I promised them years back. She has not been receptive of a passion other than her in my life. I'm looking for a "technique" if you will. One that will allow for required meditations during the day, so that I may devote the little bit of time that is not consumed by work, to my family. Any suggestions? Like maybe explain walking meditation. Is it differ  than the stilling of the mind I do during my days? Any help is appreciated, thanks in advance GWV :)
Struggle is the underlying experience of the physical existence.  All we can hope to do is still the mind, over and over again, and keep turning one's awareness to the charisms.  When we do, then we are moving toward being a mystic.
There is no progress without discipline.

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Cal

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Re: In search of understanding...
« Reply #34 on: September 07, 2014, 08:17:06 PM »
Ahh, yes, through self surrender and absorption. When you were here, in similar shoes, did you just live in the moment? To just let be what will be? I've actually gotten very good at struggle :) the bad thing is I cannot turn my back on the Truth. I just want to find what works best for right now, until I can change the structure of my life to a more accommodating one.

Cal

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Re: In search of understanding...
« Reply #35 on: September 07, 2014, 08:50:59 PM »
If I ask a seemingly different question, yet receive the same answer, I have asked the same question...

 ::)... ;D

Cal

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Re: In search of understanding...
« Reply #36 on: September 07, 2014, 11:29:47 PM »
Hi again GWV, I've been researching past lives as of late. Jeffery explains them as an experience that proceeds a Skillfullness of deep meditation. So in this regard, should I attribute this a metric of progress, when they come? I am curious about them, I have a feeling the experience could help me disassociating more skillfully during daily activity.

In this regard, also help with the burning of my many fetters, like idle chatter and impulsiveness.

Jhanananda

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Re: In search of understanding...
« Reply #37 on: September 09, 2014, 12:51:29 AM »
Ahh, yes, through self surrender and absorption. When you were here, in similar shoes, did you just live in the moment? To just let be what will be? I've actually gotten very good at struggle :) the bad thing is I cannot turn my back on the Truth. I just want to find what works best for right now, until I can change the structure of my life to a more accommodating one.
In my opinion the contemplative life is all about finding what works, and dumping what does not work, which is more of a constant honing of the edge of your awareness, and the skills to get there.
Hi again GWV, I've been researching past lives as of late. Jeffery explains them as an experience that proceeds a Skillfullness of deep meditation. So in this regard, should I attribute this a metric of progress, when they come? I am curious about them, I have a feeling the experience could help me disassociating more skillfully during daily activity.

In this regard, also help with the burning of my many fetters, like idle chatter and impulsiveness.
Uncovering past lives seems to be all about developing greater depths of self-awareness, and correcting ancient mental patterns.  So, yes, it is useful thing to develop for a dedicated contemplative, and can also be used as a benchmark of attainment.
There is no progress without discipline.

If you want to post to this forum, then send me a PM.

Cal

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Re: In search of understanding...
« Reply #38 on: September 09, 2014, 05:00:44 AM »
Dreaming has always been something of a wonder for me. Truth be told, I only recall a dream maybe once every 6 months or so. Funny thing is, I recall a dream from last night, although i dont know the meaning. I know I had only slept for about 4 hours and I awoke about 3 seconds before my alarm started going off. I died in this dream, yet it was not as I had imagined, or perhaps, it was exactly how I imagined =). There were only the faces of people that have been close to me in life, in the dream. Close to me in this life. We were "floating" near a cliff, yet in water. I was weightless. There were huge waves off in the distance that seemed to move upward, rather than in the traditional wave crashing on a cliff. Like a Tsunami. They prodded upwards, then crashed into the water, not the cliff. More would form, move in an upward fashion, then crash down into the water, yet they got closer. Everyone around me was just dumbfounded, unaware, looking at me. I remember trying to get their attention focused on the next wave that ultimately killed all of us. Then i woke up. The funny thing about these waves is that they didnt splash. They created an undercurrent, that didnt effect us until the last one, but i found it odd. I was the only person in my dream aware that something was going to happen. Ive wondered about this dream all day, but I cant really draw any kind of mystical insight from it. I can say, that I was very absorbed before bed, meh who knows. Maybe its something maybe its not. I am excited though, to have a dream, like I said, they dont come often.

Cal

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Re: In search of understanding...
« Reply #39 on: September 09, 2014, 05:17:53 AM »
Ahh, yes, through self surrender and absorption. When you were here, in similar shoes, did you just live in the moment? To just let be what will be? I've actually gotten very good at struggle :) the bad thing is I cannot turn my back on the Truth. I just want to find what works best for right now, until I can change the structure of my life to a more accommodating one.
In my opinion the contemplative life is all about finding what works, and dumping what does not work, which is more of a constant honing of the edge of your awareness, and the skills to get there.
Hi again GWV, I've been researching past lives as of late. Jeffery explains them as an experience that proceeds a Skillfullness of deep meditation. So in this regard, should I attribute this a metric of progress, when they come? I am curious about them, I have a feeling the experience could help me disassociating more skillfully during daily activity.

In this regard, also help with the burning of my many fetters, like idle chatter and impulsiveness.
Uncovering past lives seems to be all about developing greater depths of self-awareness, and correcting ancient mental patterns.  So, yes, it is useful thing to develop for a dedicated contemplative, and can also be used as a benchmark of attainment.

Thank you Jhanananda, you inspire me to search deeper. Now I will practice honing the edge of my awareness, removing distractions, and also search deeper inside, for the traits hardest to find, and correct them. I feel this may be a lengthy challenge, and will spend many hours of contemplation towards it end.

Jhanon

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Re: In search of understanding...
« Reply #40 on: September 09, 2014, 05:31:36 AM »
Dreaming has always been something of a wonder for me. Truth be told, I only recall a dream maybe once every 6 months or so. Funny thing is, I recall a dream from last night, although i dont know the meaning. I know I had only slept for about 4 hours and I awoke about 3 seconds before my alarm started going off. I died in this dream, yet it was not as I had imagined, or perhaps, it was exactly how I imagined =). There were only the faces of people that have been close to me in life, in the dream. Close to me in this life. We were "floating" near a cliff, yet in water. I was weightless. There were huge waves off in the distance that seemed to move upward, rather than in the traditional wave crashing on a cliff. Like a Tsunami. They prodded upwards, then crashed into the water, not the cliff. More would form, move in an upward fashion, then crash down into the water, yet they got closer. Everyone around me was just dumbfounded, unaware, looking at me. I remember trying to get their attention focused on the next wave that ultimately killed all of us. Then i woke up. The funny thing about these waves is that they didnt splash. They created an undercurrent, that didnt effect us until the last one, but i found it odd. I was the only person in my dream aware that something was going to happen. Ive wondered about this dream all day, but I cant really draw any kind of mystical insight from it. I can say, that I was very absorbed before bed, meh who knows. Maybe its something maybe its not. I am excited though, to have a dream, like I said, they dont come often.

In my experience, "dreams" are OOBE's where the individual is unaware. Also, as far as I have experienced, it is possible and common to absorb to "sleep", enter OOBE, be or become lucid the whole time, and "view" or "visit" those close to you, and yet they be unaware of you because they are in normal dream state.

I will leave the issue of the waves for others more experienced than I.
« Last Edit: September 09, 2014, 05:33:46 AM by Jhanon »

Jhanananda

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Re: In search of understanding...
« Reply #41 on: September 09, 2014, 11:57:58 AM »
Thank you Jhanananda, you inspire me to search deeper. Now I will practice honing the edge of my awareness, removing distractions, and also search deeper inside, for the traits hardest to find, and correct them. I feel this may be a lengthy challenge, and will spend many hours of contemplation towards it end.
You are welcome, Cal, honing the edge of my awareness through leading a disciplined contemplative life is a life-long process, and you are well on your way.
There is no progress without discipline.

If you want to post to this forum, then send me a PM.

Cal

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Re: In search of understanding...
« Reply #42 on: September 10, 2014, 12:14:33 AM »
I am becoming more and more aware of a deep seated need to be right, a know it all. I feel completely vulnerable in sharing this, but it dredges up emotions and attempts to hide. I don't know how to remove it. Should I prove myself wrong? Have others tell me I'm wrong? Both of these seem to lead to giving it a hiding place.

I have noticed it surfacing its head in conversations I call it for what it is, but it does not wish to be removed. Perhaps some sort of observance of humility would help? I've attempted this as well. The other day I was called an egomaniac. This was the first and only time I've heard these words directed my way. I struggled very much to be equanimous, as the person who said it was one that I had put deep faith in and trusted absolutely. I still struggle with not being judgemental towards this person, as I know this is not healthy for either party.  Does anyone have any advice on this? I do not wish this person any ill will, I actually wish them absolute happiness :) I'm just confused about how to skillfully approach my ego.

Jhanananda

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Re: In search of understanding...
« Reply #43 on: September 10, 2014, 12:28:52 AM »
Cal, at the core of the contemplative life is self-awareness.  Often our self-awareness reveals to us our flaws.  So we have to learn to have equanimity regarding our self, and those who expose our weaknesses for us.  But, do keep in mind, that just because someone voiced an opinion about our perceived flaws, does not mean that we actually have those flaws, unless you look inside and see that person was right.  Then we thank that person for showing use a weakness.
« Last Edit: September 10, 2014, 10:26:31 AM by Jhanananda »
There is no progress without discipline.

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Cal

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Re: In search of understanding...
« Reply #44 on: September 10, 2014, 12:44:24 AM »
Cal, at the core of the contemplative life is self-awareness.  Often our self-awareness reveals to use our flaws.  So we have to learn to have equanimity regarding our self, and those who expose our weaknesses for us.  But, do keep in mind, that just because someone voiced an opinion about our flaws, does not mean that we actually have that flaw, unless you look inside and see that person was right.  Then we tank that person for showing use a weakness.

I've been contemplating it very rigorously. Yet every time I come to the conclusion that the intent behind my assertiveness, in this context, was to help this person. Was to share what I have learned in hope of growth for them. Yet out of this context I have seen it as well. I've used it as a shield. As protection from the world. Yet it has always caused the most problems.  I did thank this person. I thanked them and told them that they were correct.  So now I look to correct it, and any detriment it has caused. Yet I refuse to be manipulated. I must return to equanimity...
« Last Edit: September 10, 2014, 05:05:33 AM by Cal »