Fruit of the Contemplative Life
Fruit of the contemplative life: => General Discussion => : Alexander February 10, 2021, 02:10:57 AM
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I don't usually post unless I feel an inner "push" to write here, but I felt like sharing one of the articles from Alexandria.
This is a topic you do not hear about often - particular in modern times. It was a discipline examined by a few thinkers in the Middle Ages, but has not really been touched since then. I assume the effort to re-establish it as a discipline would get one laughed at in today's times. There is even a modern satire about it - "how many angels could fit on the head of a needle?" - as though to denigrate it as a waste of time. But, I feel a discussion of this topic can be very productive, and can help us get a better view of the world.
If angelology is the study of angels, the first question to ask here is: what is an angel? In art, angels are portrayed as humanlike creatures with wings. We see them portrayed often in Christian, Islamic, and Jewish art. They are God's attendants, and are seen as powerful, immortal, intelligent creatures. They do not age or experience the infirmities of humans. Often, they intervene in human affairs as guides, or serve as helpers to the prophets and seers of history.
There are a couple of interesting questions here.
1. I think the first danger with angels is the extent to which we anthropomorphize them. By thinking of them as men with wings we limit our comprehension of what these entities would actually be. We think of them as being the same or very similar to us as physical humans, when in practice they would not be.
2. Thomas Aquinas' satirized question, "can multiple angels exist in the same place?" represents the danger of discussing angels. It is important whenever discussing them to keep an open mind because they would be very different from us. Perhaps the idea of "place" is not even appropriate here. (This topic always makes me think of Carl Sagan's explanation of the "fourth dimension.")
3. I think a useful exercise when discussing angels is to start with the "hierarchy of animals" we see in nature. This lets us speculate on how this hierarchy could go further from what we experience.
*Plants - Alive, but not "aware"
*Insects - Alive and aware, but lacking emotion and reason
*Animals (Sheep, dogs) - Alive and aware, with emotion but lacking reason
*Humans - Alive and aware, with emotion and reason
There is a clear hierarchy of animals in nature. At the "base" we have creatures that are physically alive but not conscious (plants); while at the top we have creatures that possess both physical life as well as "intellectual life" (humans).
So, the idea here with angels is there is another step beyond human.
*Angels - Alive and aware, with emotion and reason, but lacking physical form
It is hard to apprehend what an angel is because it transcends all the ideas we are familiar with. Yet by listing these we can see that the concept does make logical sense. I think that perhaps the best way to explain an angel is that it is a creature that would consist of "pure intellect."
4. I first opened my mind to the idea of angels when I wrapped my head around this. I thought of them as being "pure formless intelligence," beyond body, matter, or time.
5. Yet as I thought more about this, and read some accounts of out-of-body writers, I began to alter my perspective. I decided that if an angel is indeed "pure intellect," then nothing prevents it from assuming a form - any form. An angel could take on the form of a lion, man, eagle, or anything. Its ultimate nature is beyond form, but nothing prevents it from becoming any of these for a time.
6. The two big sources on angelology are the Christian theologians Pseudo-Dionysius (late 500s) and Thomas Aquinas (1200s).
7. Pseudo-Dionysius is famous for his hierarchy of angels. He ranked them as follows.
*Lowest - Angels, Archangels, Principalities
*Middle - Powers, Virtues, Dominations
*Highest - Thrones, Cherubim, Seraphim
So, Pseudo-Dionysius thought there were nine ranks of angels. There were other theologians who came up with similar lists; although their numbers would sometimes be different. It seems the most common numbers of angel "ranks" were seven, eight, or nine.
I find there are some interesting corollaries here. The first is to Buddhism, where the Buddha listed eight ranks of deva which he corresponded with the eight jhanas. I also think of the Prophet Mohammed, who in the Koran makes reference to "seven heavens." It is just interesting to me that each of these sources is coming to approximately the same number (~7-9).
8. That said, based on William Buhlman's account, it seems these perspectives may only be partly correct. Buhlman argues in favor of a vast multidimensional universe. "Why seven?" he asks. I have personally come to adopt this view.
9. I think the purpose of the "seven" number is to show there is a shift in these beings. That is, the "lower" angels are much closer in nature to humans. They may be immortal, but they still possess the forms of humans, or at least act out their existences in this way. The "higher" angels on the other hand would be increasingly formless.
A Few More Thoughts on It
10. One issue with angels - which seems to be a product of the medieval mind - is the idea that angels cannot have sex. No doubt that over the centuries this caused many to lose all interest in theology!
I think that this idea would be true for the "higher" angels that are beyond form (and here we would say the pleasure they experience is superior to physical sex), yet this would be quite wrong to say for the "lower" angels, as they would be capable of sex (and in fact sex in a much superior form to that of human beings). Here I am thinking of the devas of Hinduism and Buddhism, in which the sexual prowess of the gods is often alluded to.
11. Another question of angels is over the necessity of them. I have thought about this for years and I have begun to incline to the idea that they are necessary in order to have a "just" cosmos. The idea is that in order for karma to function effectively, one must be able to become one of these beings. It is simply not possible to fulfill so many aspects of karma within the limits of the physical world. This is a question you will have to answer on your own, but this is my thought on it.
12. Related to this is the "empty universe" problem. This is a question often posed by astronomers when they look at the universe and question why human life seems to be so alone. By this perspective the universe only seems "empty" because most everyone is not here in the physical world, but rather in the nonphysical cosmos.
13. How angels would relate to reincarnation I cannot claim to know all the answers to. In Robert Monroe's books he makes a distinction between an "angel" that has had no prior existence as a human and an "angel" that has had a prior existence as a human. Monroe suggested that the latter was "wiser" as a result, but that in every other way their powers were the same.
14. In the west, the goal of one's spiritual life is often to join the ranks of these creatures. In the east however, the Buddha offers an alternate perspective. According to the Buddha, one's existence as one of these formless intelligences is temporary, and thus the highest spiritual goal for him is to reach the transcendent state of Nirvana.
Those who favor angelic rebirth would say that this type of existence is eternal, so the idea an angel's existence is temporary raises the question of how. The Buddhist scriptures simply say that "eventually one's good karma exhausts itself" but I do not follow what this means.
15. There are tales in OOB writings of people seeing or recalling "descents" - that is, these intelligences taking on human forms. This would be a very dramatic thing to do. A human incarnation would end all one's knowledge of this mode of existence. Once incarnated as a human, one would forget everything and have to go through all the work required in order to join the angelic ranks again.
16. A final question is if it is possible to achieve enlightenment as one of these creatures. If one does not finish one's spiritual work in a human life, can one complete it as one of these creatures? The Buddha seems to suggest that the answer to this is "yes," when he examines the concept of the "nonreturners" who go on to the "pure abodes."
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Alexander, you pose an interesting topic, with a lot of density to discuss. So, let us start with the pictorial representations of angels, which in the west tends to be people with wings. The wings of course represent the ability to fly.
As you know we have discussed out-of-body experiences here at length. I argue that the wings on people in pictorial representations of angels is a direct reference to the OOBE.
In reality when a contemplative develops the ability to fly out-of-body is when they move past the 4 jhana and into the 4 ayatanas, which are all out-of-body experiences of higher domains, where we encounter divine beings. So, I would argue that there are 4 heavens, not 7 or 9, but in my experience the non-physical domains are infinite, but there are definite classes in those infinite layers.
And, one might see anthropomorphs with wings in the lower dimensions; however, the higher one goes the less the domain parallels the physical until all one encounters as beings is points of light, awareness and love, which becomes a network of points of light until one becomes that network of light, awareness and love in the highest level.
Just an interesting factoid regarding Islam and Mohamed, its founder. It just so happens that there is a term in Islam that translates as the "8 gates of Islam." The term 'gate' is a translation of the Arabic term 'jhina' which is where we get the term 'genie'.
And, as you may know genies in the Aladdin's lamp story is a spirit being who came out of a magic lamp and granted wishes to Aladdin. So, the genie is a non-physical magical being with powers. However, if you dig into Islam you will find that there is quite some fear in the general Islamic community regarding genies (jhina), because they believe that jhinas can also be malevolent, so they believe jhinas are not all benevolent.
Also, linguistically there are a number of definite connections between the Islamic term 'jhina' and the Pali term 'jhana.' 1) Phonologically there is a strong parallel between the 2 terms. 2) Both terms are used for spiritual phenomena and domains. 3) At about the time Mohamed was alive there was a resurgence of the term 'jhana' in Sri Lanka with the arising of an arahant there. He and his closest disciples were burned along with their temple by the priesthood of Buddhism, who rose up against them in rage for reviving the term 'jhana.' After that the Vissudhimaga was published to subvert the arahant's use of the term 'jhana.' So, it is my opinion that somehow the term 'jhana' made it to the Arabian peninsula and influenced Mohamed.
Also, while on the topic of angels and divine beings and linguistics and how they are represented culturally, the Pali term 'kasina' is used in southeast Asia in the same way the the term 'jhina' is used in Islam, with the same collective fear of invoking a spirit being who may or may not be malevolent. However, in southeast Asia spirit beings (kasinas) are represented as spheres of light, not anthropomorphs, so I think their representation is closer to reality.
Otherwise I find most of what passes for Angelology is fictional, so I did not pay much attention to it. The fiction is summed up in the argument of "how many angels can fit on the head of a pin." The immaterial domains are dimensionless, so the question is completely irrelevant.
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Thank you, Jeff, and another very interesting read from you as usual. I do not want to compel you to write too much, haha, if you feel your health is ailing.
Yes, I recall you telling this story before, about the Ceylonese Buddhists correctly re-interpreting the term "jhana." That there was a brief revival of "true" Buddhism on the island for a short time before the group was destroyed.
It does seem like a law of nature that this happens. It is better to keep esoteric matters esoteric for this reason. The truth is out there for those who want to find it (as it's not hidden): but if you try to propagate these ideas to the public it will never end up well for you.
Fortunately we are in a more tolerant time, where the obstacles to learning are not so insurmountable.
I always wondered, did you get this story from a history you read, or was this a product of "revealed knowledge" to you?
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I find the problem with all mainstream religions is for a religion to have the largest appeal it must be dumbed down to the lowest common denominator, and priesthoods are in religion for the money, so they want the widest appeal to acquire the greatest amount of donations coming their way, and the devout are who fund religion, so religion that says what they want it to say is what they fund. And, the devout want a very simple formula which is based upon believing a set of beliefs and that is it. The average person is lazy and stupid, so they are never going to question their belief systems, or do anything but buy into a simple belief system, and they especially are not going to lead a rigorous, self-aware, contemplative life. And, historically they will demonize if not persecute any mystic who arises. My life and work is certainly proof of that.
So, I am not for keeping esoteric knowledge secret, but I see why it has been for centuries, because of the propensity to demonize anyone who does not support the mainstream religious belief system of the day. This is true for ALL religions, and ALL periods and ALL cultures.
Esotericism is more often than not the domain of the intelligent; however, just because some belief system is common in the esoteric schools does not mean that is it not a high percentage of fiction. Nonetheless, lately I have been pondering why Leonardo da Vinci died in France in his eighties. It turns out that he had to flee to France for his life, because he had fallen afoul of the pope, and left almost everything he owned behind in Italy.
Leonardo da Vinci died in his 80s traveling and carrying the Mona Lisa. And, x-ray investigation of the Mona Lisa shows her mouth was changed many times. So, why is a master painter traveling carrying a painting in his 80s? I think it was because he was broke and the Mona Lisa was a limerick, which is a small personal portrait painted for a patron, and often not something that the wealthy buy, but families with modest incomes. And, how is it that a master painter can't get the mouth right on a portrait? I think he was paying his bills in a cheap room at a tavern painting portraits for locals, and the person he was painting the Mona Lisa for couldn't afford to pay him, so the patron kept Leonardo da Vinci running back and forth with demands that he get the mouth right, and it was most probably a portrait of a dead loved one, possibly wife or daughter.
Now, why did Leonardo da Vinci have to escape to France for his life leaving everything behind because the pope was after him? I think, since it is a given that Leonardo da Vinci was especially intelligent, then he may very well have been into the esoteric, and may very well have taken up a contemplative life, which would have been perceived of especially in the early renaissance, as devil worship.
The story I got about the persecuted arahant that arose in Sri Lanka around 500ce I got from the introduction of some Buddhist book. I think it was probably Bhikkhu Bhodi's introduction to the Visuddhimagga.
Thanks for the intellectually stimulating dialogs on my favorite subject. I don't get enough of it these days, so my memory is losing acuity.
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Ah, very interesting, I had not heard of this story of him. Do you mean Da Vinci? Or Michelangelo? They were both around the same time but I believe Da Vinci spent a lot of his later years in France...
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Yes, you are right, it is the story is da Vinci. Mixing up the story of 2 renaissance period Italian art masters is an example of my declining memory with age. Thanks for correcting me.
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I just looked up the life of Leonardo Da Vinci and found none of what I said about him, so I am not sure where I got the information, but it might be a blend of art histories. My memory is so bad these days I really should not say much any more.
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I was pondering this a few years ago; whether an "enlightened" being would still be susceptible to the aging brain. I remember there were some theories going around that said cognitive practice could stave off the effects of decline. I hypothesized at one point that an "enlightened" being might by default be doing those things enough to retain function. But, it looks like it is just random chance.
The past year I have also been witnessing the cognitive decline of my grandmother (90 now), and it is a sad end to a noble life. It does fascinate me how she can remember the times of Franklin D. Roosevelt, but forgets everything else.
It is unfortunate that the body, and the physical brain, wield so much power over us while we are here. I assume cognitive clarity is restored when OOB... but the premise of dying in a kind of body-prison is deeply concerning.
Socrates referred to his own decline in the Crito... That he knew if he escaped the poisoning he would lose his cognitive powers. Which, of course, would have made a quite sad end to his tale.
Perhaps the same concern inspired the Buddha (who was in his 80s I believe) when he ate the poisoned food, or St. Francis when he let himself die of exposure (though he was suffering, I believe, from physical, not mental, infirmities).
After my own run-in with the toxic chemical last year, and its effects on my brain, it became clear just how precarious everything is. Indeed, we are all slaves who can only submit to the Divine Will. A hit on the head can have permanent effects... All the more reason to value the spiritual, and the path to liberation.
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Yes, there is a group of hypotheses that the enlightened would have impeccable health, or superior cognitive function as they age, but you brought up the evidence to the contrary in the group of mystics you mentioned. The people of the Abrahamic religions have the story of Methuselah, and other ancient patriarchs of the Abrahamic religions, who lived for long periods of time, centuries. Early in my contemplative life I had subscribed to this hypothesis, but as time went by I found few people who were following extreme health measures were contemplatives or had superior cognitive functions.
The final blow for me was when I looked up a Chinese herbalist who had supposedly lived for 250 years, Li Ching-Yuen. So, I looked him up in Wiki and found out that in the decade before his death he claimed he was 170. But, new reporters were doing some research on him in the 1920s and found he had been given an award by an Emperor a century earlier that made him something like 250 years old by the 20s. Then following his story a photograph is taken of him in the 20s as well as 2 articles were written about him. The reports stated he looked like he was in his 70s. Shortly after the photographs and articles another reported came looking for him and his wife stated he had gone off into the mountains to die, so the trail ends there, and WWII and the Chinese revolution came along shortly there after, which erased the trail.
To understand this story more, it turns out that the man was an herbalist, and his family was engaged in selling herbs with a reputation life extension, most notably ginseng, and dong quai. So, we can see that the family was motivated to produce a fantastic claim to promote their herb business, and we can explain the deception by the oldest son would take over the deception upon the death of the father, and that deception kept up for generations until 250 years goes by.
So, if we apply this deception to the biblical patriarchs who supposedly lived for centuries, then we can see how this deception could have been applied in those cases. However, the deception only works when there are no photographs, no close scrutiny, and no DNA tests.
So, back to the bigger picture, we are spirit encased in a "cage of flesh" which we can learn to leave in OOBEs from leading a rigorous, self-aware contemplative life. However, we keep coming back to the cage of flesh until it dies, when we are finally released from it at its death.
So to bring this discussion full circle back to how religions decline we see that decline in how much they emphasize fantastic stories of miracles. What better fantastic story than to have a patriarch who lives for centuries, but remains youthful?
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Yes, I remember. And just like you were interested in these tales on longevity, I was also open for a long time to the miraculous. "They are such a core part of Christianity and the Gospels," I thought. "How could they be entirely false?" I paid special attention to that Greek word "dynamikos": for instance, the Gospel quote "He (Christ) felt the power (dynamikos) go out of him" when the woman touched his cloak. When the woman did this, she also experienced healing. In that one line, it seemed to be exploring the mechanics behind miracle-working.
Gurdjieff was interested in miracles as well... He had a few interesting takes on it. His idea of the "large accumulator" makes me think of the extreme things humans are capable of when under the effects of adrenaline. But, I can think of no example of it outside of that.
There are, of course, the contemplative phenomena which are real... but the feats of Jesus, such as walking on water in the physical body, or cursing a tree to make it wither, we know are creative fiction. Purposeful - to show the power of a true spiritual teacher to an ancient audience - but today an unneeded source of confusion for modern readers.
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On miracles:
I noticed some decades ago that the less miracles appeared in a book of philosophy the more wisdom was present; and consequently I was very pleasantly surprised to see there are very few miracles in the Pali Canon, but it is rich in wisdom. The same goes with the dialogs of Plato, here Socrates demonstrates great wisdom, but no miracles. Rumi, Kabir, Teresa of Avial, and John of the Cross reveal the charisms, but no miracles.
In my own life back 47 years ago when I tapped into major charisms I took up healing work, and I had considerable success at it, and my patients came back for more because they observed improvements in their health from my work on them. However, there was no radical healing. I did not raise the dead, nor did I walk on water, but I flew out-of-body daily, and felt the charisms (virtue/dynamikos) present in me all of the time. So, I concluded that, while there is some healing possible in the transference of energy/charisms/virtue/dynamikos; nonetheless the laws of physics can not be violated on the material plane, thus miracle stories are only how religions market themselves to the naive, and a means of reducing the competition with mystics, and therefore the pursuit of miracles is a fool errand.
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Hi Alexander, I have a close spirit friend who is a mid grade angel myself, I have worked with her since Christmas Eve 2017 when we met. She is incredibly loving, positive and bubbly, think of Jeannie on 'I Dream of Jeannie". She has been a loving support to my spiritual pratice and has helped me with self healing since then. She can't seem to fly or change forms though but in the highest realms she takes on a non-human form like an orb with 'wing-like' waves eminating from her. She was a male Taoist hermit in the 12th century and moved up to 'non-returner' status based on what she told me. I'm happy to talk about her and answer any questions if you have any interest.
-David
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Hello Dave,
What do you recommend as a daily practice to induce the OOBE? I try to meditate each day but I get exhausted on weekdays after working all day. I also do the 24/7 practices (I’m in a persistent thought free state). Thanks.
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Hi Alexander, nice to make your acquaintence. Keep in mind I have know Jeff since 2003, he was my first main teacher whom I studied exclusively with until 2009 on Yahoo groups. I have a teacher that specializes in Astral Projection, that is all he teaches whom I learned from. When I did my training it was minimum of 90 minutes a day, up to 3 hours. It took me 100 days before I had my first projection.
The way my teacher taught me is a little different, its a pretty extensive program with 20 different exercises and the way I was taught is very non-traditional. I project mainly by looking at my reflection in a mirror. I start to see the other reality in my minds eyes and my awareness of this body dims as the visuals become deeper, as the projection deepens it moves from 'minds eye' to 'physical eye' and is like a transparency of the other reality laid over my visual field. As the transparency becomes more visible to my physical eyes my body goes into a 'numb state' which feels deeper than my meditation, possibly 4th Jhana(?). This is about as far as I have gone, but I have not done much projection since 2019. Due to suppression and what Jeff calls 'demonization' I have had to spend alot of time doing protection magic (long story).
The spirit I mentioned here sometimes astral travels with me, although generally she is with me in the physical like a ghost. She seems to easily astral travel though.
Have you tried mirror gazing projections? My teacher taught me to, among his other practices, develop projection sit in front of a mirror with a candle, express Metta sentiments by saying "I Love you and I trust you" to your reflection and relax focusing on your reflection. Like I said above it took me 100 days but I did start to project. Each mirror sit should be at least 10 minutes according to my teacher, 2-4 times daily. I feel 10 minutes is ideal, less and you can't get into full projection, more and you are just enjoying the experience and not doing focused training so I agree with his session length suggestion from experience. He suggested to me to set a 10 minute timer actually which helped me.
-David
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It's challenging to work a full time job and also meditate much I am aware. I quit my job in April to go on full time retreat (my 4th retreat) because I was just not developing enough. I am lucky to get food stamps and a free government phone and be able to stay with my parents to continue my training. -David
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Thank you Dave and I hope you will stay with us on the forum, it is interesting to bring in the different traditions. I do admire Jeff’s approach, as I believe it is the most mature. His system integrates the different traditions (ie, Buddhism, Christianity, Sufism, occultism, etc), and places the spiritual experience in the context of the mysticisms of the various world religions.
I’ve had a couple strange experiences, one where I believe my waking awareness projected out in the middle of the room, though I recall it then immediately snapped back into my physical body. I had another where I believe I was standing beside my nighttable (in ghostly form) trying to make an entry in my dream journal but I wasn’t there in the physical LOL.
My pinched nerve obstructed me from practice much of the last year, though I’ve returned this last week to ~2 hours a day. I have not had luck with Jeff’s method (he seems a natural projector unlike me), so I’ve been reading other teachers (Robert Bruce’s 90 day projection guide if you have heard of him). Bruce’s energy work brought tangible results, and I felt the energy passing through the hands and feet (what Jeff associates with the charisms of the third jhana).
I also want to mention the introspective side of the spiritual life which I believe is crucial; the metanoia, the spiritual crisis, the climbing of the Seven Story Mountain. I believe that work is a key part of why we are here.
Re: articles; as I mentioned yesterday I compiled all of them on the companion site which you could use for your perusal. And we could use them as a jumping off point to discuss things. Though I believe there is also a copy of almost everything on here.
Om namah shivaya ;D
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Sure bro, I pretty much am a shut in, living with my spirits, mom, dad and bro since April so lots of time to chat.
My projection experiences are different than most because of the way I was taught I suppose. It's more like 'astral bilocation' because I experience both realities but not either one fully. Imagine looking at a projection on a wall of another world, my astral projection is like that, and I don't 'pop out of body' the other reality 'fades in over this reality' like a projector slowly being brightened. Also I don't experience projections on this world, they all seem to be parallel dimensions and sometimes its the future or the past. When my training was really strong I could project to other solar systems in the galaxy, apparently. There were always Archangels protecting me and visiting me during projections as well. My teacher told me they would guide me. In that case they were not ghiosts in this reality like my Angel friend but only appeared in the astral projection.
Yes Jeff is very knowledgable about different lineages, I'm a little intellectual but not like him, hah!
Robert Bruce I've heard is good yeah. I just tried projecting again this afternoon I can still do it, but the transparency of the other world is less opaque than when I was training in 2019-2020.
I also went through alot of spiritual crisis, depression and difficulty. I kept quitting my job and doing retreat and each retreat it has smoothed out. From 2007 to 2008 I did one, from 2013 to 2014, from 2016 to 2017 and after 5 years at my last job I left in April. Each retreat has helped. Ill check out your site.
Thank you,
-David
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I've had a few strange experiences too. I've never experienced 'full projection' meaning total loss of awareness of this body but in my deepest projections, which are usually sitting still in front of a mirror my entire body becomes numbed at 8-10 minutes, perhaps it is 4th Jhana, and in deepest projections my focus shifts to a large degree to the parallel reality to the point where I emotionally identify with that reality.
I tend to go to a reality where my desires get fulfilled, such as after seeing the Movie Captain Marvel I had a desire to meet her and during the next projection I projected to her and we had an adventure. I came back feeling extremely fullfilled almost like the desire was really lived. So in that way I think the projections dissolve ego blocks. -David
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It reminds me of a book called “Phasing Primer” by Xanth I read on a forum once. Phasing from the one reality to the other. 🤔
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Yes that is how I experience 'astral projection'. It's so different from what most people call 'astral projection' that I hesitate to use the term. Sometimes I call it 'causal projection'. Unsure what to call it. The teacher in this lineage calls it 'DOT Travel' meaning to travel through the dot of the 3rd eye to another place in the multiverse.
Feel free to ask any more questions about my training although it took substantial effort for about 6 months before I had regular experiences every time I sat at the mirror. I was lucky I had a part time job that paid so well. It was alot of work to do that training and work a job. The ability to travel got to the point where I could do it anywhere if I kept my eyes still, even while typing here, although the opacity of the other world is not as intense as if I sit at a mirror. I used this ability once to help cross over a friend's passed father, apparently. My friend a 35 year meditator could also astral project and saw the same scene I did interestingly. -David
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Good decision. I cannot wait for the day to come when I no longer have to work a full time job and just focus on practice. This is my biggest dream. But I have a family to support so I need continue at least for now. While I love my family, Im realizing more and more that regular householder life is not for me. Like Buddha said it is confined and dusty...
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Well I have gotten some unexpected financial support this retreat which will allow me to prolong it, maybe to 2 years. I applied for food stamps which normally you can only get if you are fired but because of Covid I got them and have had then for 10 months now. I don't have kids luckily, and because I am on food stamps I can get a free government phone and free minutes.
Other than that I just have a few expenses, a little gas, car insurance and a few odds and ends that I have to buy now and then. Still looking to see if there is more free government money available for my retreat though. Maybe there are other programs available to cover my odds and ends?
-David