The Lord of the Rings Soundtrack: The Breaking of the FellowshipThe first 60 seconds of this track have always been heart-breakingly beautiful for me to experience. I think it's because it reflects human life from a broad view. Like a tsunami, life can be crushing and devastating. But the Ocean, which makes the tsunami and song possible, is vast and beautiful.
Yes, there are waves and destruction, but without the waves we couldn't know the stillness--without the destruction we couldn't know the potential.
This ultimate Essence, this Ocean, is so still, yet dynamic and perfect that it is absolutely beyond human expression. All beautiful art comes from mere drops in the cup, in our awareness. But to be immersed, fulfilled and pervaded in It...there are no fitting words for such an experience. Every time I try to express It, I am pained. Pained in a way that I could never be pained enough.
Words flow easily from the heart onto the paper, but they go on to seemingly contradict themselves. This is how beautiful It is. So beautiful that It is a paradox. So beautiful that the natural and terrible fear of first experiencing It's tremendous gravity is itself beautiful. It is like standing alone on the beach, watching that 100 foot tsunami wave only seconds from engulfing you. Despite the terror, you are overwhelmed with a paralyzing awe as your Essence is filled with transcendent ecstasy. None know genuine relief until they have such an experience.
It is no coincidence that experiencing deep fulfillment--such as when a mother first sees her newborn birthed--causes water to flow from our eyes. Just as a cup is immersed in water and itself full-filled, so too do we overflow with water during times of fulfillment. Just as tears run down the face of every human who experiences the Ocean. Because it is beyond the capacity of language, of art, of you or me, to describe or contain something so profoundly essential as to be beginningless and endless. At most we can describe the clouds reflected in it, and that takes the form of tears running down our face.
It seems if there is such a thing as a meaning or purpose of life, it is to serve as expression of this Essence, to subtly remind us of it, to realize and ultimately reunite with It. Just as water is rain from the sky, ice in the poles, and rivers running through the landscape, so, too, we are many, but like the water in all its forms, we will ultimately reunite with the Ocean.
I could write about this for ages, and it would not be ages wasted. Even when others read it and see not what is behind the words. Just the dipping of toes into the Ocean for inspiration to write is enough to go days without food or rest.
I've listened to this track and written for over 3 hours, and I am not yet tired. Because it's the Essence that I'm really listening to. And It is everything and anything anyone could ever want or need.
Despite my efforts, I've failed yet again to communicate that from which all things compared are nothing.