Hello Alex and Jhananada,
Thanks for writing back
Ashram is an option but trust me it's not an easy decision to make here in India cause your life is influenced so much by the family.. now adays my sister is staying with me and if i Quit job that wud mean no financial assistance for my parents and sister. The social structure here makes it difficult to make free choices like that. Moreover in ashram people won't encourage you to sit idle cause of some disability or health condition unless u have something to offer, money perhaps. That brings another aspect of financial freedom, and the job i have is with the Govt, if I quit this then therez no returning to this same job. I also wanted to earn a bit before i quit for lifetime from the jobs. But the inflation is killing it, no matter how much u save it's not enough. I wudnt wanna end up 20-30 years down the line , with no money and a worse health condition. The medical and old age facilities in India are worse. U can't expect any help from anyone once u stop earning.
Sorry to hear abt ur enlarged liver. U can try detoxification herbs it's called "triphala" for a few days at night before sleeping it might help get rid of some toxins.
I guess living in India or Usa have its own pros n cons but nonetheless life is a mess mostly everywhere.
Jeffery, I m glad to learn that you are feeling better. I knw everytime u have suggested air filter for the health issues, i actually wud wanna try that my only apprehension is what if i body get used to it and i can't remain off of it for even few hours, it wud become arduous to maintain that with a desk job.
My plan was to either earn so much and retire to some forest area like u r which seems impossible now with the current job n inflation. Other way was to learn a way to earn so that ican beat inflation, only thing was to learn trading stocks n forex which I'm learning from past 3 years almost.
With these constraints I'm trying to make best of the things n keep myself contained.
On the other hand, my depth of silence is automatically growing, meditation feels like it's happening to me on its own since i have dropped all the passions, desires, ego centric life. It feels like a free fall into the source of creation. However i don't do sitting meditations cause it brings back nausea and palpitations.
To add about my health condition, the abdominal pain n breathlessness is much much better since i have stopped eating fruits n raw vegetables/salads, curd etc all the cold and kapha increasing foods. Also it seems like water was also having some kindof effect. Changed the water too.
Recently i have been on a official visit to other city and my health felt better, near the Sea shore and warm humid weather. The city I'm in is mostly cold damp n cloud cover n polluted too. But the nerve pains n no better, they seems to get silghtly downhill.
Hopefully you guys are doing better. It's kindof delayed reply from my side.
