Author Topic: Rougeleader (beginner)  (Read 59806 times)

rougeleader115

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Rougeleader (beginner)
« on: December 18, 2013, 06:00:06 PM »
Hello to everyone,

I want to start off by first thanking you Jhanananda for allowing me to post here.

I am 21 years old and I have been meditating on and off since early summer of 2011.  I started off meditating sporadically about 20-30 minutes once and sometimes two times a day but only about 4 or 5 days out of the week. But by August 2012, I had found a few online gurus who insisted on meditating at least a few hours everyday. I was desperate and I had not tried meditating that much and decided (against the advice of the neo-advaitans) to try it out, just in case 2012 just so happened to be the end. I found pushing into the hour mark gave my mind and body time to settle and truely begin to relax. The pose I have used almost every time has been lying flat on my back with a small pillow behind my head. Sometimes I sit on a pillow or bed to work on sitting meditation, but I'm still working through a lot of tension and trauma I caused to my body playing sports in my teenage years. But since starting meditation I have become aware of a lot of pain in my body. I had surgery earlier this year, and since then it has been like my body has been under constant reconstruction. I had not realized how bad my posture had been and how injuries had altered the way my bones and muscles carried my weight. So stretching has been my bodies savior as well as mediation by helping me become aware of and relax those tensions.

I started to enjoy meditation so much because I found a lot of relief from both my physical and mental issues.  But shortly after November 2012, I began to find fears coming up. There were just simple things like my fear of heights that was challenged first by the floating sensation I would feeling in meditation. Sometimes it would just feel like I was high up and I would feel nervous. Or a full body warmth that felt like I was being lightly baked in the sun or a fever (couldn't help but think maybe it was the devil or a demon). By this point I was meditating at 1-1.5 hour intervals about 3-6 times a day. Then within the following weeks I found that a lot of fear was coming up due to the sensations I began to feel. Piercing and expanding sensations in my head, throat, and heart throughout the day. A tickling at the top of my head like ants on my brain, and a sort of sensation like I am about to float out of that tickley sensation at the top of my head (feels weird trying to explain that feeling). The sensations grew more and more until around February when they were so intense, that I could not sit still without some kind of distraction. I felt like I was being wiped out by the sensations and was really afraid of possession.

My vision field was beginning to get a high definition quality to it and sometimes it felt as though there was just too much for me to see. The same happened to my hearing in that it felt as though no noise in the vicinity went past without me hearing it. There were a couple of days I just laid down in great fear because I couldn't shut anything off and distract myself. Sleep was my only comfort, what little I could get. At just random intervals I would just get waves of energy in my body and the various sensations would get stronger at the same time. Throughout the day, it was usually intense enough to feel like I was going to lose track of myself  physically or mentally. I also began to have dark blue almost opaque orbs and sometimes a very quick static flash in my vision field(I am not certain if these are charismatic). I thought I was going blind and went to get my eyes checked out and was told they were fine regardless of those symptoms. As for the tinnitus I have, I can not tell you the origination of it. I remember hearing it in silence when I was young and about to take a nap or sleep, so maybe I was born with it if that even happens? So I can't say that it is charismatic either, it has never changed to another sound, it sounds like I'm hearing it in both ears, and I hear it with earplugs and no external disturbances. It does get louder sometimes on its own, and seems to become more noticable when I meditate consistantly, but that could just be me being more aware of it. It kept me from sleeping when I first began to notice it was always there earlier this year, but I've been feeling a little easier about it lately.

I stopped meditating from April till June out of fear, and the orbs disappeared from my vision, as well as the floating out of my head kind of feeling which gave me a more grounded feeling. But when the sensations in the chakras and light waves of energy throughout the day started to slow down, I found myself being agitated by life again and missed the kind of cushion the sensations felt like to the harshness of the world. So I began meditating for an hour in the morning and at night, and sometimes during the day, and they turned up in intensity according the time I spent in meditation.  No visual stuff now, but intense body sensations that sometimes feels like a palpable big fat grub wiggling in my chest and head, it is oddly pleasant but still intense at times. I also had come across the GWV around July and that helped me to feel like maybe these things aren't pathalogical or made up.

As for what actually happens in meditation, I usually begin by lying down and relaxing my body. I follow my breath if I need to, but recently I just sink into the energy or feel for the piercing or tingling in my heart. After my mind and body settle a bit(which definitely varies in time every session), the sensations get stronger and eventually I start to be mainly aware of the energy sensations and my body falls into a secondary awareness. Most sessions have ended up with me A)falling asleep B)going unconcious or into black (cant tell which one) C) what I think might be lucid dreaming or D) Just enjoying the sensations arise and intensify and then ease after about an hour and a half. I have not had any activity in my spine or a jolt up the back.

 Also at night, especially the nights I meditate right as I'm falling asleep, I find I have what I think are lucid dreams all night if not just nothing. I feel aware in the dreams, but not like "I am dreaming". The reason I don't know is because I still go through with reactions as if everything is normal in the dream. Like if I'm all of a sudden in someones car going somewhere, I don't question it, its as if I just woke up in the next situation and go along with it. The other night I was some random prisoner on a bus, and a few guys decided to escape and I was appearantly supposed to be going with them. I didn't question like I would here and  rationalize that I probably wouldnt get away with it, or even that I was a prisoner randomly, instead I ran with them immediately like I was meant to. Is this lucid or just a regular dream? When does a lucid dream cross the line into an OOBE?
 
 I realize now that this isn't necessarily an introduction, but I am working on it.  I will get a more proper introduction down when I get the time to do so, but for now hello and thank you for reading.   :)

I apologize for the length and if it doesn't make sense in some areas. Please give me any guidance as to what's what in this description so for, and please let me know if I need to make corrections in my practice. I have read many of your writings and book, and watched many of your videos, but this is the closest I can get to actually talking to you about these things.

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Re: Rougeleader (beginner)
« Reply #1 on: December 18, 2013, 11:40:18 PM »
Hello to everyone,

I want to start off by first thanking you Jhanananda for allowing me to post here.

Welcome rougeleader115, and thank-you for posting your kind words of support.

I am 21 years old and I have been meditating on and off since early summer of 2011.  I started off meditating sporadically about 20-30 minutes once and sometimes two times a day but only about 4 or 5 days out of the week. But by August 2012, I had found a few online gurus who insisted on meditating at least a few hours everyday. I was desperate and I had not tried meditating that much and decided (against the advice of the neo-advaitans) to try it out, just in case 2012 just so happened to be the end. I found pushing into the hour mark gave my mind and body time to settle and truely begin to relax.

Relaxation is a key component in deep meditation that those who never get to deep meditation can never accomplish.

The pose I have used almost every time has been lying flat on my back with a small pillow behind my head.

While most of my meditation practice was in cross-legged sitting pose, and I recommend it for deep meditation; nonetheless, most of the people posting here their case histories meditate lying down.

Sometimes I sit on a pillow or bed to work on sitting meditation, but I'm still working through a lot of tension and trauma I caused to my body playing sports in my teenage years. But since starting meditation I have become aware of a lot of pain in my body. I had surgery earlier this year, and since then it has been like my body has been under constant reconstruction. I had not realized how bad my posture had been and how injuries had altered the way my bones and muscles carried my weight. So stretching has been my bodies savior as well as mediation by helping me become aware of and relax those tensions.

Deep meditation does tend to clue us into our bodily needs.  The deep relaxation of deep meditation also tends to repair body damage, making deep meditation useful for healing work.

I started to enjoy meditation so much because I found a lot of relief from both my physical and mental issues.  But shortly after November 2012, I began to find fears coming up. There were just simple things like my fear of heights that was challenged first by the floating sensation I would feeling in meditation. Sometimes it would just feel like I was high up and I would feel nervous. Or a full body warmth that felt like I was being lightly baked in the sun or a fever (couldn't help but think maybe it was the devil or a demon). By this point I was meditating at 1-1.5 hour intervals about 3-6 times a day.

Deep meditation requires self-awareness, and that self-awareness tends to clue us into our subconscious emotional problems, which is something that people who never arrive at deep meditation obviously lack self-awareness, among other things.

Fear of demon-possession is also common among those who meditate deeply, because there is just so little factual information about deep meditation states, and so much nonsense about demonic possession etc.

Then within the following weeks I found that a lot of fear was coming up due to the sensations I began to feel. Piercing and expanding sensations in my head, throat, and heart throughout the day. A tickling at the top of my head like ants on my brain, and a sort of sensation like I am about to float out of that tickley sensation at the top of my head (feels weird trying to explain that feeling). The sensations grew more and more until around February when they were so intense, that I could not sit still without some kind of distraction. I felt like I was being wiped out by the sensations and was really afraid of possession.

These all sound like classic charisms.

My vision field was beginning to get a high definition quality to it and sometimes it felt as though there was just too much for me to see. The same happened to my hearing in that it felt as though no noise in the vicinity went past without me hearing it.

This is classic hypersensitivity.

There were a couple of days I just laid down in great fear because I couldn't shut anything off and distract myself. Sleep was my only comfort, what little I could get. At just random intervals I would just get waves of energy in my body and the various sensations would get stronger at the same time. Throughout the day, it was usually intense enough to feel like I was going to lose track of myself  physically or mentally. I also began to have dark blue almost opaque orbs and sometimes a very quick static flash in my vision field(I am not certain if these are charismatic). I thought I was going blind and went to get my eyes checked out and was told they were fine regardless of those symptoms. As for the tinnitus I have, I can not tell you the origination of it. I remember hearing it in silence when I was young and about to take a nap or sleep, so maybe I was born with it if that even happens? So I can't say that it is charismatic either, it has never changed to another sound, it sounds like I'm hearing it in both ears, and I hear it with earplugs and no external disturbances. It does get louder sometimes on its own, and seems to become more noticable when I meditate consistantly, but that could just be me being more aware of it. It kept me from sleeping when I first began to notice it was always there earlier this year, but I've been feeling a little easier about it lately.

These could be charismatic, but maybe not.

I stopped meditating from April till June out of fear, and the orbs disappeared from my vision, as well as the floating out of my head kind of feeling which gave me a more grounded feeling. But when the sensations in the chakras and light waves of energy throughout the day started to slow down, I found myself being agitated by life again and missed the kind of cushion the sensations felt like to the harshness of the world. So I began meditating for an hour in the morning and at night, and sometimes during the day, and they turned up in intensity according the time I spent in meditation.  No visual stuff now, but intense body sensations that sometimes feels like a palpable big fat grub wiggling in my chest and head, it is oddly pleasant but still intense at times. I also had come across the GWV around July and that helped me to feel like maybe these things aren't pathalogical or made up.

How you know that these are charisms is they respond to the practice of meditation.

As for what actually happens in meditation, I usually begin by lying down and relaxing my body. I follow my breath if I need to, but recently I just sink into the energy or feel for the piercing or tingling in my heart. After my mind and body settle a bit(which definitely varies in time every session), the sensations get stronger and eventually I start to be mainly aware of the energy sensations and my body falls into a secondary awareness. Most sessions have ended up with me A)falling asleep B)going unconcious or into black (cant tell which one) C) what I think might be lucid dreaming or D) Just enjoying the sensations arise and intensify and then ease after about an hour and a half. I have not had any activity in my spine or a jolt up the back.

 Also at night, especially the nights I meditate right as I'm falling asleep, I find I have what I think are lucid dreams all night if not just nothing. I feel aware in the dreams, but not like "I am dreaming". The reason I don't know is because I still go through with reactions as if everything is normal in the dream. Like if I'm all of a sudden in someones car going somewhere, I don't question it, its as if I just woke up in the next situation and go along with it. The other night I was some random prisoner on a bus, and a few guys decided to escape and I was appearantly supposed to be going with them. I didn't question like I would here and  rationalize that I probably wouldnt get away with it, or even that I was a prisoner randomly, instead I ran with them immediately like I was meant to. Is this lucid or just a regular dream? When does a lucid dream cross the line into an OOBE?

This is clearly lucid dreaming.  It becomes an OOBE when you have control, and you know that you are out-of-body.

I realize now that this isn't necessarily an introduction, but I am working on it.  I will get a more proper introduction down when I get the time to do so, but for now hello and thank you for reading.   :)

I apologize for the length and if it doesn't make sense in some areas. Please give me any guidance as to what's what in this description so for, and please let me know if I need to make corrections in my practice. I have read many of your writings and book, and watched many of your videos, but this is the closest I can get to actually talking to you about these things.
Welcome, you are doing fine, just keep it up.  You do not have to learn any lingo at all.
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rougeleader115

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Re: Rougeleader (beginner)
« Reply #2 on: December 20, 2013, 01:24:32 PM »
Hello Jhanananda,

Thank you for your suggestions and answering my questions. I will work on building up my sitting practice. I will also not worry about my tinnitus since I cannot tell if it is charismatic, and because it doesn't increase in volume besides my attention being on it in meditation. Now about the hypersensitivity, I haven't had to experience it as badly as the beginning months of this year, even though I started meditating again. And a lot of intense emotions came up during the hypersensitivity. Would it be wise to continue meditating during a time when the senses feel too receptive and emotions are intensifying?

I am also glad to hear that these dreams are at least lucid dreams. They were so real feeling sometimes that they'd imprint like a waking memory, and I'm sure it will only gain in intensity. I will allow the OOBE to blossom on its own because I feel as if I should allow the base of equanimity to grow more in myself. I have found a definite decrease in fear(and emotional intensity in general) in regards to many of the situations and circumstances I have found myself in since beginning to meditate. But I know too that things can and do pop up that feel like triggers just specifically for those issues I think I've gotten through. I can actually feel the difference in my internal space of not feeling so gripped by my emotions and desires. But obviously I have not worked through all of my issues or else I would not still feel like they are lurking around in me waiting. Since around the age of 16, I have had many lucid dreams of watching loved ones die, killing people(including loved ones), and also of being killed myself. When I first started to have these, I thought I was going schizophrenic and went to have many tests done and saw a psychiatrist. I was told I had PTSD which was leading me to be dissociative, have bad dreams, and insomnia, and that I was most likely going to be schizophrenic as I aged. Those symptoms persisted strongly until I was about 19-20 and I began meditating. I went through a time that felt like meditation was going to be the thing that made me an official schizophrenic because I found myself more dissociative, my insomnia got worse (so more nights spent lying awake all night, or passing out for short intervals with no dreams), and with all that my nightmares seemed to increase so that whenever I could sleep, I would have nightmares to wake me right back up.

Things are a little more stable since the summertime. I am able to sleep for the most part easily with no medication(5-6 hours), still have strange and sometimes violent dreams, but I don't feel as broken apart mentally when they get bad or I watch a loved one die or disown me. Would this be considered a building of equanimity?

As for dissociation, it is weird to explain. I went through a phase of letting the dissociation have its way and now I find can't necessarily relate to a person and their emotions over specific situations. I may know how things are making them feel, and I may even feel their stress(or excitment), but sometimes I just cant seem to react in an absolutely genuine way to express that I am happy or sad for them. I had gotten alright at doing it for appearances in school, but my loved ones know that at times I seem cold and very distant to everything, even when I don't necessarily feel cold(I may even feel strongly). It just feels like for so many intense emotions, they were so much that I couldn't even find a way to express it, so I would just be quiet. Sometimes it felt like nothing short of wailing at the sky or killing myself would work. I feel as though I care even more than your average person in some situations but I may not show it (not for appearances, just naturally because the external reactions sometimes seem to take extra effort to display), but if your were inside of me it could be felt just how much is flowing(whether good or bad).
Were you ever judged for "not caring enough"? Is this normal to experience?

I know that I cannot help but ask questions you have heard many times before, but please know you are of tremendous help to me and I'm sure many others here and through your work. You have given more meaning to my life than I have ever felt. I thought there was nothing in my future but pain and death (aka suffering), and even if there is much of that in my future, I never would have dreamed there was bliss, joy, and ecstasy waiting to be carried along through that suffering. Even though it doesn't make my life the piece of cake walk I had previously craved for, it has softened some of its razor sharp edges so that I may not get cut and bled so easily. Thank you.

In time I will make a post under lucid dreaming, if there isn't a good one already, and ask any lingering questions I have for right now. And I also have some questions on ethics and how you all have made a living with meditative absorption, but I will find a place for those as well.

And Jhadon, I hope that you read this far, I wanted to say thank you for your reply a few days ago. I read it but no longer see it for me to respond to. It was very supportive and though I can't remember what it said specifically, I was grateful for your help as well. I hope things go well for us both in exploring these states. :)

My final question for right now is, how should I go about getting over my fear of the blissful feelings being overwhelming? The bliss feels wonderful and clean, unlike any drug I've had, but also at times way more intense than anything I've experienced. Will dipping myself into the bliss over and over make me feel more comfortable(kind of like exposure therapy) or is there something else specific I should be doing?

Rougeleader


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Re: Rougeleader (beginner)
« Reply #3 on: December 20, 2013, 04:59:26 PM »
Hello Jhanananda,

Thank you for your suggestions and answering my questions. I will work on building up my sitting practice. I will also not worry about my tinnitus since I cannot tell if it is charismatic, and because it doesn't increase in volume besides my attention being on it in meditation.

Well the definition of the difference between tinnitus and charismatic sound is the sounds get louder when you meditate.  So, if they do, then I will take it as charismatic.

Now about the hypersensitivity, I haven't had to experience it as badly as the beginning months of this year, even though I started meditating again. And a lot of intense emotions came up during the hypersensitivity. Would it be wise to continue meditating during a time when the senses feel too receptive and emotions are intensifying?

Yes, whenever the world seems to be too much for us, then it is best to learn to take refuge in meditation, especially meditation that results in the religious experience (samadhi).

I am also glad to hear that these dreams are at least lucid dreams. They were so real feeling sometimes that they'd imprint like a waking memory, and I'm sure it will only gain in intensity.

There are a number of definitions of lucid dreaming, most of which I reject.  The key definition of lucid dreaming that I go by is, relative realism.  If it seems "real" then it is lucid.

I will allow the OOBE to blossom on its own because I feel as if I should allow the base of equanimity to grow more in myself. I have found a definite decrease in fear(and emotional intensity in general) in regards to many of the situations and circumstances I have found myself in since beginning to meditate. But I know too that things can and do pop up that feel like triggers just specifically for those issues I think I've gotten through. I can actually feel the difference in my internal space of not feeling so gripped by my emotions and desires. But obviously I have not worked through all of my issues or else I would not still feel like they are lurking around in me waiting.

The deeper we go into meditation, and the religious experience, and the more often we do so, then the greater our tranquility and equanimity become.  However, there are limits.  We can be driven mad like anyone else, so, to maintain our tranquility and equanimity we often find it necessary to modify our lifestyle to make it more conducive to these attainments.

Since around the age of 16, I have had many lucid dreams of watching loved ones die, killing people(including loved ones), and also of being killed myself. When I first started to have these, I thought I was going schizophrenic and went to have many tests done and saw a psychiatrist. I was told I had PTSD which was leading me to be dissociative, have bad dreams, and insomnia, and that I was most likely going to be schizophrenic as I aged. Those symptoms persisted strongly until I was about 19-20 and I began meditating. I went through a time that felt like meditation was going to be the thing that made me an official schizophrenic because I found myself more dissociative, my insomnia got worse (so more nights spent lying awake all night, or passing out for short intervals with no dreams), and with all that my nightmares seemed to increase so that whenever I could sleep, I would have nightmares to wake me right back up.

As long as the psychiatric community dismisses the religious experience as nothing more the religious psychosis, then mystics, like you and I, will just get medicated until we drool.

Things are a little more stable since the summertime. I am able to sleep for the most part easily with no medication(5-6 hours), still have strange and sometimes violent dreams, but I don't feel as broken apart mentally when they get bad or I watch a loved one die or disown me. Would this be considered a building of equanimity?

Many of our lucid dreams are recollections of previous lifetimes, and what stands out most are often the most dramatic, or traumatic events, which are the births and deaths.  So, one is likely to go through a period of lucid dreams about death and dying.  I did.  Psychiatrists are going to look at that dream content and raise your dosage level.

As for dissociation, it is weird to explain. I went through a phase of letting the dissociation have its way and now I find can't necessarily relate to a person and their emotions over specific situations. I may know how things are making them feel, and I may even feel their stress(or excitment), but sometimes I just cant seem to react in an absolutely genuine way to express that I am happy or sad for them. I had gotten alright at doing it for appearances in school, but my loved ones know that at times I seem cold and very distant to everything, even when I don't necessarily feel cold(I may even feel strongly). It just feels like for so many intense emotions, they were so much that I couldn't even find a way to express it, so I would just be quiet. Sometimes it felt like nothing short of wailing at the sky or killing myself would work. I feel as though I care even more than your average person in some situations but I may not show it (not for appearances, just naturally because the external reactions sometimes seem to take extra effort to display), but if your were inside of me it could be felt just how much is flowing(whether good or bad).
Were you ever judged for "not caring enough"? Is this normal to experience?

The religious experience (samadhi) is characterized by tranquility, equanimity and a non-dual perspective upon life.  This is incorrectly diagnosed by psychiatrists as a disassociated state.  So, yes, I spend most of my time in this state, and I love it.

I know that I cannot help but ask questions you have heard many times before, but please know you are of tremendous help to me and I'm sure many others here and through your work. You have given more meaning to my life than I have ever felt. I thought there was nothing in my future but pain and death (aka suffering), and even if there is much of that in my future, I never would have dreamed there was bliss, joy, and ecstasy waiting to be carried along through that suffering. Even though it doesn't make my life the piece of cake walk I had previously craved for, it has softened some of its razor sharp edges so that I may not get cut and bled so easily. Thank you.

The endless repetitions that tend to drive me bat guano is the endless questioning of the central premises that are required to grasp to understand the contemplative life and how it can, but not necessarily, lead to the religious experience; especially when they are asked by people who never get there and are unwilling to believe that they have bought into a mountain of nonsense, and until they unpack their erroneous belief systems, they are never going to allow themselves to have a genuine religious experience. 

I expect that everyone who comes here is going to ask much the same questions about their religious experience, and they do, and that does not bother me.

In time I will make a post under lucid dreaming, if there isn't a good one already, and ask any lingering questions I have for right now. And I also have some questions on ethics and how you all have made a living with meditative absorption, but I will find a place for those as well.

And Jhadon, I hope that you read this far, I wanted to say thank you for your reply a few days ago. I read it but no longer see it for me to respond to. It was very supportive and though I can't remember what it said specifically, I was grateful for your help as well. I hope things go well for us both in exploring these states. :)

My final question for right now is, how should I go about getting over my fear of the blissful feelings being overwhelming? The bliss feels wonderful and clean, unlike any drug I've had, but also at times way more intense than anything I've experienced. Will dipping myself into the bliss over and over make me feel more comfortable(kind of like exposure therapy) or is there something else specific I should be doing?

Rougeleader
Yes, putting your toe into the water gets you used to accepting that it is wet, and that it is enjoyable.  But, you know that there are deep spots in the river, because you fall in from time to time, and you have not learned to swim yet.  You learn where the deep spots are, and you learn to avoid them until you gain confidence in your swimming ability, or acquire some scuba diving equipment.  In between time you might take some swimming lessons.

I hope that metaphor works for you.
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Re: Rougeleader (beginner)
« Reply #4 on: December 20, 2013, 08:14:08 PM »
Hey Rougeleader,

You saw that, huh? :)

I deleted it because I felt I was being overwhelming and did not represent Jhananda or the group as well as I would prefer. Despite no one in this group (Sangha?) ever saying something to this effect, I intend to show my gratitude and respect for them in any way I can. This was the motivation behind deleting it. I didn't want to be the over eager dog that turns off the newcomer before they get through the door--Ha!

However, I am pleased you felt the warm welcome I intended. Despite barely knowing you, and some of this group, I have a strong appreciatiom for all mystics/contemplatives. We all know how challenging this path can be. From the rigors of cleansing of our past, to most everyone not understanding us, to experiences so powerful we might seem crazy. It is a gift to have fellow contemplatives. This should be at least one place where we all feel welcome. And yes, I realize the latter part of this message contradicts my motivations for deleting the prior post. The middle way can be tricky!

I hope to respond more to the mystical content of your posts when I get time to use the laptop later.

Hope to see you continuing to post. I, for one, never get tired of reading posts on here  :)

PS I fully agree with everything Jhananda just said. In regard to psychiatrists and "disorders", have a look at my and Michel's entries in the "Case Histories." Although I forgot to mention it in those posts, I was also diagnosed with PTSD. I hope relating to you my many brushes with western medicine provides you with some comforting perspective in relation to your own brushes with them.

Also, excellent swimming metaphor, Jhananda.
« Last Edit: December 20, 2013, 10:14:49 PM by Jhanon »

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Re: Rougeleader (beginner)
« Reply #5 on: December 21, 2013, 12:04:10 AM »
Also, excellent swimming metaphor, Jhananda.
Thanks, but I had read your response and liked it.  I did not not know that you had deleted it, and I am sorry you did so.  Please feel free to respond to people here, because this is a forum for mystics, not a soap box for me, or for born-again, fundamentalist  Buddhists.
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Re: Rougeleader (beginner)
« Reply #6 on: December 21, 2013, 01:01:05 AM »
Hello Jhanon and Jhanananda,

No worries here, I did feel very welcome from your responses. I too try not to come on too strong for the sake of not scaring others away. But please  feel free to express yourself when talking to me. I have read through many of the post from Michel and Jhanananda, and I hope soon to talk to and read more from Michel as well. I would love to respond to some of your posts and others here, I am just a little slower than I thought I'd be. I'm glad that we can relate about things like psychiatric diagnoses, it helps me feel like much less of a victim when I see it is so common. I like the metaphor you used as well Jhanananda. And I apologize from spelling your name as "Jhadon" in my last post, I don't know why I thought that was what I read haha.


Rougeleader
« Last Edit: December 21, 2013, 01:03:51 AM by rougeleader115 »

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Re: Rougeleader (beginner)
« Reply #7 on: December 21, 2013, 01:32:23 AM »
...I apologize from spelling your name as "Jhadon" in my last post, I don't know why I thought that was what I read haha.


Rougeleader
No problem, Rougeleader, I thought you were referring to Jhanon, but I have dyslexia, so I am used to misspelling names and words all of the time, so it is not big deal to me.
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Jhanon

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Re: Rougeleader (beginner)
« Reply #8 on: December 21, 2013, 03:19:07 AM »
Also, excellent swimming metaphor, Jhananda.
Thanks, but I had read your response and liked it.  I did not not know that you had deleted it, and I am sorry you did so.  Please feel free to respond to people here, because this is a forum for mystics, not a soap box for me, or for born-again, fundamentalist  Buddhists.

Thank you, and duly noted. I've been attempting to censor myself in one way or another for so long, it is often difficult to remember that I don't have to do that here. I'm so used to people looking at me like there is something wrong with me (the same way, Rogueleader, you were talking about people saying you "Don't care enough"--which incidentally, has also happened to me throughout life). Huh--I never consciously acknowledged that bit about censoring myself until just now. The truth of the matter is that I externally process very well, and if that means full enlightenment sooner, then maybe I will just say what I have to say on here from now on. Maybe it will look like I am self-absorbed or the eager dog at the door. Suppose I'll probably never be the spitting image of the Buddha or the other mystics of past, but I can at least attain the superior fruit.

...I apologize from spelling your name as "Jhadon" in my last post, I don't know why I thought that was what I read haha.


Rougeleader
No problem, Rougeleader, I thought you were referring to Jhanon, but I have dyslexia, so I am used to misspelling names and words all of the time, so it is not big deal to me.

Jhananda, I would never have guessed you have dyslexia. It is very interesting to me that almost every mystic I've met has been diagnosed with some kind of mental or cognitive "disorder". Yet these people are among the brightest and wisest I've ever known of.

Hello Jhanon and Jhanananda,

No worries here, I did feel very welcome from your responses. I too try not to come on too strong for the sake of not scaring others away. But please  feel free to express yourself when talking to me. I have read through many of the post from Michel and Jhanananda, and I hope soon to talk to and read more from Michel as well. I would love to respond to some of your posts and others here, I am just a little slower than I thought I'd be. I'm glad that we can relate about things like psychiatric diagnoses, it helps me feel like much less of a victim when I see it is so common. I like the metaphor you used as well Jhanananda. And I apologize from spelling your name as "Jhadon" in my last post, I don't know why I thought that was what I read haha.

No worries about the name, friend. And I am glad we share in efforts to not come on too strong. I could somehow sense that in your posts, and I think this is part of the reason I was so eager to greet you. Ironic how it turned out.

My vision field was beginning to get a high definition quality to it and sometimes it felt as though there was just too much for me to see. The same happened to my hearing in that it felt as though no noise in the vicinity went past without me hearing it.

This is classic hypersensitivity.

It's interesting you mention this. I distinctly recall a few instances before the more powerful mystical experiences happened, where this high definition vision happened. For me, everything was clearer and sharper, more detail, but what I remember most was it was as if I was simultaneously processing MUCH more. Everything, including the periphery, seemed crystal clear, and I was aware of it all at once. It was as if the tiny speck of focus we usually have was widened to encompass all of the visual field. It was a profound feeling. The one I remember best is while driving. I do not recall if this also included other senses.

Jhananda, was I just mis-interpreting or imagining things? Or is this is indeed possible? If so, is it possible to always have everything in the visual field focused and processed? Is this how you avoided the accident you posted somewhere else, the one where you had a van-load of people that were shocked you avoided it? I also believe I recall you saying on the GWV site that you encompass all your senses simultaneously within one awareness. I also noticed in your videos that you appear to be able to do many things at once while carrying on deep conversations.

If I understand your writings about encompassing your six senses within awareness correctly, and from experience I know similar things happen during meditation (and awareness encompassing vast reaches in the immaterial domains), and that by its nature I think awareness is unbounded, then by that reasoning it seems possible to do this with vision during daily life? Does this is all connect the way it seems? Wait!.....

In other words, is it possible, during daily life, to be consistently, simultaneously and continuously aware of everything that hits the senses? Not just jumping from one sense-impact to the other, but everything AT ONCE?

I don't know why this is so captivating to contemplate, but I think I am starting to understand something revelatory about "ADHD". I can't put it into words yet, but it is deeply relieving and touching to think about it. I don't know why or what, but there just seems to be something here that explains a lot.

Even if I am just drunk on impossibilities, I have to say it again; I am so grateful for this forum, the GWV and Jhananda. Never in this life have I felt as good as I have since finding my way here.
« Last Edit: December 21, 2013, 03:42:43 AM by Jhanon »

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Re: Rougeleader (beginner)
« Reply #9 on: December 21, 2013, 12:48:16 PM »
...Maybe it will look like I am self-absorbed or the eager dog at the door. Suppose I'll probably never be the spitting image of the Buddha or the other mystics of past, but I can at least attain the superior fruit.

This is where I hope the mystics among us will find a comfortable home, where they can finely feel safe to express themselves.  There is no reason why any of us have to be like any mystic in the past.  We can be the buddhas of the present and future.  Most of us here have already demonstrated that the superior fruit of attainment (maha-phala) is possible to attain, because we are attaining.  If one of us can attain it, then we all can.

Jhananda, I would never have guessed you have dyslexia. It is very interesting to me that almost every mystic I've met has been diagnosed with some kind of mental or cognitive "disorder". Yet these people are among the brightest and wisest I've ever known of.

It took computerized spell checkers, + google, + heavy self-editing to finally get to the point of being able to write so that others can read it. 

Yes, I agree, it seems to be a characteristic of the mystic that we are too often misdiagnosed.  It will take a community of mystics to force the culture to accept our differences.

It's interesting you mention this. I distinctly recall a few instances before the more powerful mystical experiences happened, where this high definition vision happened. For me, everything was clearer and sharper, more detail, but what I remember most was it was as if I was simultaneously processing MUCH more. Everything, including the periphery, seemed crystal clear, and I was aware of it all at once. It was as if the tiny speck of focus we usually have was widened to encompass all of the visual field. It was a profound feeling. The one I remember best is while driving. I do not recall if this also included other senses.

Jhananda, was I just mis-interpreting or imagining things? Or is this is indeed possible? If so, is it possible to always have everything in the visual field focused and processed? Is this how you avoided the accident you posted somewhere else, the one where you had a van-load of people that were shocked you avoided it? I also believe I recall you saying on the GWV site that you encompass all your senses simultaneously within one awareness. I also noticed in your videos that you appear to be able to do many things at once while carrying on deep conversations.

Good memory, correct, we can walk and drive through life with this type of "high-definition" or "panoramic view" by keeping our mind in the present, and still, and upon the charisms, we can even avoid accidents, as you recalled correctly, by seeing all of the obstacles in our way at once, and reacting in precisely how we need to, without engaging the mind, or emotions in that reaction.  By no coincidence, this is also how the martial artist works.

If I understand your writings about encompassing your six senses within awareness correctly, and from experience I know similar things happen during meditation (and awareness encompassing vast reaches in the immaterial domains), and that by its nature I think awareness is unbounded, then by that reasoning it seems possible to do this with vision during daily life? Does this is all connect the way it seems? Wait!.....

In other words, is it possible, during daily life, to be consistently, simultaneously and continuously aware of everything that hits the senses? Not just jumping from one sense-impact to the other, but everything AT ONCE?

Yes, awareness, is unbound, and non-local. It happens to reside in this body temporarily, but it can move to other location at will. This is how I move through life, so there is no reason why all of you could not do so.

I don't know why this is so captivating to contemplate, but I think I am starting to understand something revelatory about "ADHD". I can't put it into words yet, but it is deeply relieving and touching to think about it. I don't know why or what, but there just seems to be something here that explains a lot.

Both of you have expressed panoramic view, but, psychiatry would medicate you if you told them about it.  So, I can see how you would find it very useful that others have what you have.

Even if I am just drunk on impossibilities, I have to say it again; I am so grateful for this forum, the GWV and Jhananda. Never in this life have I felt as good as I have since finding my way here.

Well, I hope you all have found a home, where you are free to express yourself with people who are much like you.
There is no progress without discipline.

If you want to post to this forum, then send me a PM.

rougeleader115

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Re: Rougeleader (beginner)
« Reply #10 on: December 21, 2013, 03:46:13 PM »

Thank you, and duly noted. I've been attempting to censor myself in one way or another for so long, it is often difficult to remember that I don't have to do that here. I'm so used to people looking at me like there is something wrong with me (the same way, Rogueleader, you were talking about people saying you "Don't care enough"--which incidentally, has also happened to me throughout life). Huh--I never consciously acknowledged that bit about censoring myself until just now. The truth of the matter is that I externally process very well, and if that means full enlightenment sooner, then maybe I will just say what I have to say on here from now on. Maybe it will look like I am self-absorbed or the eager dog at the door. Suppose I'll probably never be the spitting image of the Buddha or the other mystics of past, but I can at least attain the superior fruit.

That censorship is what I at least try to encourage others to break free from around me. I felt as though it brought up many more unneeded issues in my relationships than was expected, or the relationship never went below surface level. I'm not at all perfect in being open (but I work on it when the situation allows, such as on this forum), but I have found my life and relationships much more enjoyable and touching when we decide not to hide ourselves so much or judge so heavily. I'm glad you are deciding to say what you have to say because it will bring comfort for others to say what they need to without harsh judgement. There of course some things that do much more harm than good and should be avoided, but I think most of us aren't out to intentionally harm anyone here, so I have much less fear about speaking about these things openly even though I never really have before.


It's interesting you mention this. I distinctly recall a few instances before the more powerful mystical experiences happened, where this high definition vision happened. For me, everything was clearer and sharper, more detail, but what I remember most was it was as if I was simultaneously processing MUCH more. Everything, including the periphery, seemed crystal clear, and I was aware of it all at once. It was as if the tiny speck of focus we usually have was widened to encompass all of the visual field. It was a profound feeling. The one I remember best is while driving. I do not recall if this also included other senses.

Jhananda, was I just mis-interpreting or imagining things? Or is this is indeed possible? If so, is it possible to always have everything in the visual field focused and processed? Is this how you avoided the accident you posted somewhere else, the one where you had a van-load of people that were shocked you avoided it? I also believe I recall you saying on the GWV site that you encompass all your senses simultaneously within one awareness. I also noticed in your videos that you appear to be able to do many things at once while carrying on deep conversations.


Good memory, correct, we can walk and drive through life with this type of "high-definition" or "panoramic view" by keeping our mind in the present, and still, and upon the charisms, we can even avoid accidents, as you recalled correctly, by seeing all of the obstacles in our way at once, and reacting in precisely how we need to, without engaging the mind, or emotions in that reaction.  By no coincidence, this is also how the martial artist works.

I will definitely try utilizing this when these types of things begin to happen:"keeping our mind in the present, and still, and upon the charisms"

I find it amazing to hear you two talk about this being related to meditative absorption. I used to tell my friends that after about my 3rd year of training in martial arts, I began to get a full view of my opponent during a match. This made it very easy to watch them shift their weight for an attack, or see how they distributed themselves in real-time. At the same time I was also finding it easier to move and attack spontaneously when I let my mind go and moved and flowed with the fight(I know this sounds like a cliche, which I'm sure is why no one listened to me, but I was amazed to find it actually worked), instead of moving within a set number of movements that had been practiced repetitively. This made my last year of fighting like I was learning to dance, instead of being so head forward and brutal.

 This makes it seem possible that I was experiencing some portion of jhana during training and matches. I was practicing 2-4 hours about 3-5 days a week for about 4 years. This is also the reason I have a lot of body tensions because I surely didn't listen to my body sensitively during that time, besides when it was injured.

When it began to intensify earlier this year on a more consistent basis, I thought I had done something terribly wrong with my practice. I was afraid I had tried too hard, which is still at least partially true. If we use the metaphor, I could say in my desperation to learn to swim, I walked out into the river until I started to feel my feet slip from beneath me from the current. Now I know to take it easier and have some patience, which should have been common sense in the first place. Without any guidance in sight, I did become desperate though. I'm glad I made it here.


Yes, awareness, is unbound, and non-local. It happens to reside in this body temporarily, but it can move to other location at will. This is how I move through life, so there is no reason why all of you could not do so.

I feel as if I've had a few glimpses of this, at least to the point of seeing my point of view leave the range of my body a few times. These were mostly traumatic for me sadly, because I had absolutely no control where I ended up, which made me feel like I could easily lose track of my body.
Is it possible for that to happen? How do you keep track of yourself? And does the "point of view leaving the range of my body" relate to the OOBE, or should I toss it under mental projection?

I'm also glad to be getting the hang of this quoting system, it looked so confusing the first few times I tried it haha.


Good day to you all,
Rougeleader

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Re: Rougeleader (beginner)
« Reply #11 on: December 21, 2013, 09:00:04 PM »
...Maybe it will look like I am self-absorbed or the eager dog at the door. Suppose I'll probably never be the spitting image of the Buddha or the other mystics of past, but I can at least attain the superior fruit.

This is where I hope the mystics among us will find a comfortable home, where they can finely feel safe to express themselves.  There is no reason why any of us have to be like any mystic in the past.  We can be the buddhas of the present and future.  Most of us here have already demonstrated that the superior fruit of attainment (maha-phala) is possible to attain, because we are attaining.  If one of us can attain it, then we all can.

This is definitely a comfortable home, Jhananda.

You're right. It is an immense help to interact with others who have attained. I recall a sutta where the Buddha asks a man if he knows the way to a city. The man says "Yes". He says something to the effect "I've been there so many times, I could find my way there if I was blindfolded." The Buddha says "So, too, the Tathagata having found the way to Enlightenment (?) leads the way for others."

My memory isn't so good about this one, but I think you get the point I am making. Those who have found there way can help others to the same.
Jhananda, I would never have guessed you have dyslexia. It is very interesting to me that almost every mystic I've met has been diagnosed with some kind of mental or cognitive "disorder". Yet these people are among the brightest and wisest I've ever known of.

It took computerized spell checkers, + google, + heavy self-editing to finally get to the point of being able to write so that others can read it.

Yes, I agree, it seems to be a characteristic of the mystic that we are too often misdiagnosed.  It will take a community of mystics to force the culture to accept our differences.

Well, that is impressive, Jhananda. I don't know if you need to hear this, but having gone through a lot of trouble with my "diagnosis", it is touching when someone confirms I have overcome it. I, too, hope to leave the classification of ADHD in the dust. I don't have any trouble paying attention anymore, especially to things that matter, but I am also eager to cultivate this panoramic view of all the senses that we've been talking about.

It's interesting you mention this. I distinctly recall a few instances before the more powerful mystical experiences happened, where this high definition vision happened. For me, everything was clearer and sharper, more detail, but what I remember most was it was as if I was simultaneously processing MUCH more. Everything, including the periphery, seemed crystal clear, and I was aware of it all at once. It was as if the tiny speck of focus we usually have was widened to encompass all of the visual field. It was a profound feeling. The one I remember best is while driving. I do not recall if this also included other senses.

Jhananda, was I just mis-interpreting or imagining things? Or is this is indeed possible? If so, is it possible to always have everything in the visual field focused and processed? Is this how you avoided the accident you posted somewhere else, the one where you had a van-load of people that were shocked you avoided it? I also believe I recall you saying on the GWV site that you encompass all your senses simultaneously within one awareness. I also noticed in your videos that you appear to be able to do many things at once while carrying on deep conversations.

Good memory, correct, we can walk and drive through life with this type of "high-definition" or "panoramic view" by keeping our mind in the present, and still, and upon the charisms, we can even avoid accidents, as you recalled correctly, by seeing all of the obstacles in our way at once, and reacting in precisely how we need to, without engaging the mind, or emotions in that reaction.  By no coincidence, this is also how the martial artist works.

And perhaps by no coincidences, Rogueleader is able to confirm this about the martial arts (although I didn't doubt it.) This is very captivating news about the panoramic view. I feel even more motivated.

If I understand your writings about encompassing your six senses within awareness correctly, and from experience I know similar things happen during meditation (and awareness encompassing vast reaches in the immaterial domains), and that by its nature I think awareness is unbounded, then by that reasoning it seems possible to do this with vision during daily life? Does this is all connect the way it seems? Wait!.....

In other words, is it possible, during daily life, to be consistently, simultaneously and continuously aware of everything that hits the senses? Not just jumping from one sense-impact to the other, but everything AT ONCE?

Yes, awareness, is unbound, and non-local. It happens to reside in this body temporarily, but it can move to other location at will. This is how I move through life, so there is no reason why all of you could not do so.

Excellent.
I don't know why this is so captivating to contemplate, but I think I am starting to understand something revelatory about "ADHD". I can't put it into words yet, but it is deeply relieving and touching to think about it. I don't know why or what, but there just seems to be something here that explains a lot.

Both of you have expressed panoramic view, but, psychiatry would medicate you if you told them about it.  So, I can see how you would find it very useful that others have what you have.

Even if I am just drunk on impossibilities, I have to say it again; I am so grateful for this forum, the GWV and Jhananda. Never in this life have I felt as good as I have since finding my way here.

Well, I hope you all have found a home, where you are free to express yourself with people who are much like you.

I certainly have. Thank you again.
« Last Edit: December 21, 2013, 09:23:45 PM by Jhanon »

Jhanon

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Re: Rougeleader (beginner)
« Reply #12 on: December 21, 2013, 09:22:05 PM »

Thank you, and duly noted. I've been attempting to censor myself in one way or another for so long, it is often difficult to remember that I don't have to do that here. I'm so used to people looking at me like there is something wrong with me (the same way, Rogueleader, you were talking about people saying you "Don't care enough"--which incidentally, has also happened to me throughout life). Huh--I never consciously acknowledged that bit about censoring myself until just now. The truth of the matter is that I externally process very well, and if that means full enlightenment sooner, then maybe I will just say what I have to say on here from now on. Maybe it will look like I am self-absorbed or the eager dog at the door. Suppose I'll probably never be the spitting image of the Buddha or the other mystics of past, but I can at least attain the superior fruit.

That censorship is what I at least try to encourage others to break free from around me. I felt as though it brought up many more unneeded issues in my relationships than was expected, or the relationship never went below surface level. I'm not at all perfect in being open (but I work on it when the situation allows, such as on this forum), but I have found my life and relationships much more enjoyable and touching when we decide not to hide ourselves so much or judge so heavily. I'm glad you are deciding to say what you have to say because it will bring comfort for others to say what they need to without harsh judgement. There of course some things that do much more harm than good and should be avoided, but I think most of us aren't out to intentionally harm anyone here, so I have much less fear about speaking about these things openly even though I never really have before.

I fully agree with everything you have said here.

I, too, have found a primary barrier in relationships is that I have to encourage the other person to let down their barriers, and know that I never intend to hurt them. Sometimes I have to make entire evenings out of this effort, like finding a way for their fears and ego to subside as we appreciate the smell of grape wine vines as we lay on the top of a vehicle and watch the stars. This it the kind of thing I have to do, and then encourage them to let their barriers down. And, indeed, looking back on all my intentions when a person is hurt recently, I never intended any harm in any way. Which, I must say is quite nice on the conscience :)


It's interesting you mention this. I distinctly recall a few instances before the more powerful mystical experiences happened, where this high definition vision happened. For me, everything was clearer and sharper, more detail, but what I remember most was it was as if I was simultaneously processing MUCH more. Everything, including the periphery, seemed crystal clear, and I was aware of it all at once. It was as if the tiny speck of focus we usually have was widened to encompass all of the visual field. It was a profound feeling. The one I remember best is while driving. I do not recall if this also included other senses.

Jhananda, was I just mis-interpreting or imagining things? Or is this is indeed possible? If so, is it possible to always have everything in the visual field focused and processed? Is this how you avoided the accident you posted somewhere else, the one where you had a van-load of people that were shocked you avoided it? I also believe I recall you saying on the GWV site that you encompass all your senses simultaneously within one awareness. I also noticed in your videos that you appear to be able to do many things at once while carrying on deep conversations.


Good memory, correct, we can walk and drive through life with this type of "high-definition" or "panoramic view" by keeping our mind in the present, and still, and upon the charisms, we can even avoid accidents, as you recalled correctly, by seeing all of the obstacles in our way at once, and reacting in precisely how we need to, without engaging the mind, or emotions in that reaction.  By no coincidence, this is also how the martial artist works.

I will definitely try utilizing this when these types of things begin to happen:"keeping our mind in the present, and still, and upon the charisms"

I have full confidence that this is how it is done. Looking back on my meditations of recent, it all lines up. I must say that I am also eager to experience the full symphony of ear, nose, taste, sight, kundalini and tactile charisms as they build and evolve in harmony. Right now I only rarely experience auditory, visual, and tactile at the same time. But it is indeed like listening to the most blissful symphony, which furthers the central themes of music concept in the Buddha's teachings.

Additionally, music is how I first began to get in touch with charisms like kundalini and tactile. I remember the first times it began happening after I had a few mystical experiences. I could put myself in this "place" mentally, where it felt like the music was living through me. Blissful energy would blast down my spine at the peaks of the music, and shockwaves would radiate out to all of my body, standing every hair on its end. I even snapped some pictures of this which I still have. Anyway, this was when I started really lining up with what meditation could offer. It's actually happening right now.

When I meditate often and regularly in jhana, lately, when I listen to the right music (like that which I shared on a recent post) is even more blissful and easy to access that state. And to think that my senses will only intensify in sensitivity, probably much like that of when an individual is on LSD, really makes me pleased. The gifts of this path are truly wonderful and satisfying. And perhaps there is a common origin to why we must be present to receive these presents :)

I find it amazing to hear you two talk about this being related to meditative absorption. I used to tell my friends that after about my 3rd year of training in martial arts, I began to get a full view of my opponent during a match. This made it very easy to watch them shift their weight for an attack, or see how they distributed themselves in real-time. At the same time I was also finding it easier to move and attack spontaneously when I let my mind go and moved and flowed with the fight(I know this sounds like a cliche, which I'm sure is why no one listened to me, but I was amazed to find it actually worked), instead of moving within a set number of movements that had been practiced repetitively. This made my last year of fighting like I was learning to dance, instead of being so head forward and brutal.

Wow, Rogueleader. It is fascinating to me that so many things are "lining up" (for lack of a better term) on this thread. Perhaps as similar as the phenomena which arise when all the planets line up.

This makes it seem possible that I was experiencing some portion of jhana during training and matches. I was practicing 2-4 hours about 3-5 days a week for about 4 years. This is also the reason I have a lot of body tensions because I surely didn't listen to my body sensitively during that time, besides when it was injured.

When it began to intensify earlier this year on a more consistent basis, I thought I had done something terribly wrong with my practice. I was afraid I had tried too hard, which is still at least partially true. If we use the metaphor, I could say in my desperation to learn to swim, I walked out into the river until I started to feel my feet slip from beneath me from the current. Now I know to take it easier and have some patience, which should have been common sense in the first place. Without any guidance in sight, I did become desperate though. I'm glad I made it here.

I am glad you made it here, too. It does seem reasonable to think you were in 1st jhana or at least saturated during your practice. Especially considering what I just said about my experiences with music. In many ways, music was the entry point to the actualization of jhana and the path to enlightenment. If I could feel that good, and life seemed so deep and interesting just while listening to music, I figured there MUST be something to this. Some underlying mechanics or phenomena. And what do you know, it seems there is.


Yes, awareness, is unbound, and non-local. It happens to reside in this body temporarily, but it can move to other location at will. This is how I move through life, so there is no reason why all of you could not do so.

I feel as if I've had a few glimpses of this, at least to the point of seeing my point of view leave the range of my body a few times. These were mostly traumatic for me sadly, because I had absolutely no control where I ended up, which made me feel like I could easily lose track of my body.
Is it possible for that to happen? How do you keep track of yourself? And does the "point of view leaving the range of my body" relate to the OOBE, or should I toss it under mental projection?

I believe I have read elsewhere on here, perhaps by Jhananda, that it is not possible to lose your way back to the body. Within a single mind-moment you can be back in your body. But I'll leave it up to him for a more solid answer.
I'm also glad to be getting the hang of this quoting system, it looked so confusing the first few times I tried it haha.

Likewise. It gets easier.
« Last Edit: December 21, 2013, 09:29:53 PM by Jhanon »

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Re: Rougeleader (beginner)
« Reply #13 on: December 21, 2013, 11:27:14 PM »
I will definitely try utilizing this when these types of things begin to happen:"keeping our mind in the present, and still, and upon the charisms"

I find it amazing to hear you two talk about this being related to meditative absorption. I used to tell my friends that after about my 3rd year of training in martial arts, I began to get a full view of my opponent during a match. This made it very easy to watch them shift their weight for an attack, or see how they distributed themselves in real-time. At the same time I was also finding it easier to move and attack spontaneously when I let my mind go and moved and flowed with the fight(I know this sounds like a cliche, which I'm sure is why no one listened to me, but I was amazed to find it actually worked), instead of moving within a set number of movements that had been practiced repetitively. This made my last year of fighting like I was learning to dance, instead of being so head forward and brutal.

 This makes it seem possible that I was experiencing some portion of jhana during training and matches. I was practicing 2-4 hours about 3-5 days a week for about 4 years. This is also the reason I have a lot of body tensions because I surely didn't listen to my body sensitively during that time, besides when it was injured.

It should not come as a surprise that I too studied martial arts for a number of years, so this is why I can connect the contemplative life with the kind of mental and physical discipline of martial arts.

Is it possible for that to happen? How do you keep track of yourself? And does the "point of view leaving the range of my body" relate to the OOBE, or should I toss it under mental projection?

While I understand the fear, and its origin, I know from experience that it is impossible to lose track of your body when in an OOBE.  Just decide to come back, and bamm you are there.

This is definitely a comfortable home, Jhananda.

You're right. It is an immense help to interact with others who have attained. I recall a sutta where the Buddha asks a man if he knows the way to a city. The man says "Yes". He says something to the effect "I've been there so many times, I could find my way there if I was blindfolded." The Buddha says "So, too, the Tathagata having found the way to Enlightenment (?) leads the way for others."

My memory isn't so good about this one, but I think you get the point I am making. Those who have found there way can help others to the same.

I am glad you find this forum comfortable, and I appreciate your posting, because forums need participants. 

I get what you are saying. Thanks for the nice quote.  We could almost convert it to instruction for returning to the body.

And perhaps by no coincidences, Rogueleader is able to confirm this about the martial arts (although I didn't doubt it.) This is very captivating news about the panoramic view. I feel even more motivated.

It is just par for the course.  Part of the superior fruit (maha-phala) of the contemplative life.
There is no progress without discipline.

If you want to post to this forum, then send me a PM.

rougeleader115

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Re: Rougeleader (beginner)
« Reply #14 on: January 06, 2014, 10:14:21 PM »
Hola hola,
Over the past 2 weeks when I sit to meditate, I sometimes find after about 45 mins or so that I start blacking out after the sensations intensify. I catch my head just as it is falling forward and it brings me back before I fall over. I was thinking I was just tired, but it keeps happening and it doesn't seem to matter whether I am fatigued before meditation or not. This sometimes happens during lying down meditation as well, but should I push to stay alert or is it fine for this to happen?